Have you ever wondered what really makes you happy? I'm sure you think you know, but what if I told you that it's not that clear-cut. That what you think makes you joyful, actually doesn't. It's not that obvious, so instead, I'll tell you how I found out for myself. I asked the same question many times this year. So, this summer, I took part in a simple experiment that made me realize what really makes me feel alive.
Do You Know What Makes You Happy?
I discovered I was totally wrong about what I thought made me happy and I would like to share the simple experiment that allowed me to discover the truth.
I Thought Music Was The Thing
A few months ago, if you'd ask me what excited me most in life, I would have answered music, particularly music festivals. I would often clear my entire schedule to make time to attend musical events. However, in August 2016, I took part in an experiment that changed my perspective.
The experiment involved a Messenger App designed to see if people "really" know what makes them happy. The design is very simple. Users are asked only one question on a daily basis: "How are you?" You can answer "Green" for positive, "Yellow" for neutral or "Red" for negative. It then asks the participant to write what part of the day has made him or her feel this way.
Little by little I came to realize how I felt and what made me feel that way. To my surprise, I identified my moods were "Yellow" or sometimes even "Red," in the days surrounding musical events.
My Green days seemed to be uncorrelated to my nights out at music festival. It turns out the times I was the happiest were for a reason I never suspected.
Parenthood Can Be Stressful But...
As a young father, I have lots of love for my children, but—let’s be honest—kids can be stressful. For this reason, I always thought that times spent with them would be associated with anxiety. However, I discovered that my "Green" moods were often triggered when I would spend time with the kids. Often, my best days followed days I would spend building a campfire with the kids or when I would take a little dive in the water. When I would spend time in nature or and be part of all these activities with my kids, I would find that the moment wasn’t so big in that instant, but I quickly realized that I would consistently be more "Green" afterward. Moreover, I was astonished to realize that these experiences had recharged me going into the week. All these other moments during the stressful work week turned "Green."
My Wish For Everyone
As simple as it might sound, just being asked the question "How are you doing?" on a daily basis was a huge way of stepping out from myself and understand the deeper reasons behind my happiness. I think we should all take a second, every day to assess how we actually feel and as a result find out what truly makes us happy because only then can we become better parents, friends, co-workers, and humans. I invite you to do the same. I dare you to go find out what makes you feel alive.
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