Let’s be honest– no one is confident 100 percent of the time.
However, great confidence is possible — and it makes a monumental difference in virtually anything you do throughout your life.
So what’s the best way to realize that level of confidence? Emulation. It might sound cheesy, but acting more like someone who is confident really does help you become more confident. Your thoughts influence your behavior, which then determines your actions, and those actions influence your thoughts in one continuous cycle.
But how does a truly confident person act? One of the most telling signs is their language. What is the vocabulary of a confident person? Everyone is different, but there are certain words that confident people tend to steer clear of.
You just have to be yourself and go full with confidence and be courageous.
– Gabby Douglas
Here are five words that confident people (almost) never use:
Perhaps the most dangerous word on this list, “can’t” is most frequently used as an admission of inability. To say “I can’t” is to not only say, but also truly believe, that you can’t do something.
If you want to embody confidence, this word should be stripped from your internal vocabulary right now. Sometimes you’ll feel like you can’t, as we’re all human and doubt ourselves from time to time, but never allow this to become a part of your internal dialogue.
At times, this will seem impossible. But a confident person believes in the power of personal growth and knows that if they don’t have the ability or resources to do something right now, they can always acquire or work towards whatever they need to accomplish it.
“Won’t” isn’t as damaging as can’t but it’s very telling of your own subconscious mindset. “I won’t be able to do that” or “I won’t make it” is an indication that you’re wired to believe you just don’t have the ability or resources to make something happen.
A confident person knows their limits, which means phrases like “I probably won’t be able to get to that, considering everything else I have to do already” are both common and a good sign the person has a good grasp on their capability and time-management.
However, when “won’t” is used to refer to your believed inability to do something, you’re not being your confident self. Try saying “I don’t know for sure, but I’ll give it my all” instead.
“Never” can be used in a positive way — i.e., “I’ll never quit”– but more often than not we use it to express our own inability.
But “never” is different from “can’t” and “won’t” because it refers to an indefinite length of time. For that reason, I’ve found it’s more commonly used with the internal dialogue, “I’ll never get…” or “I’ll never be good enough to…” It strikes straight through the heart of who we are and reminds us of our failures and shortcomings.
A confident person knows that failure is always a possibility, but to say that you can never do something is downright ludicrous. If you aren’t where you want to be now, you can always learn and grow until you get there. Never use the word never, and never accept the belief that you can never do something.
A confident person believes they can accomplish their goals. Therefore, quitting is just not in their vocabulary.
Sure, at some point we all feel like quitting. We lose faith in ourselves and our ability, realize that we’re not as good as we thought we were, or just lose the ability to keep pushing on after a marathon of struggles.
However, a confident person believes there’s always a way– no matter what happens.
Nothing is guaranteed. To some degree, hope plays a part in everything we do.
However, confident people don’t act from a place of hope and “what if”– they’re the architects of their own life. If they want to do something, they make a plan that will help them get it done.
Ultimately, the chips will fall where they may, but the confident person takes their destiny into their own hands and does all they can to make it happen– and believes they can do just that.