Even if you’ve been dating for years, it’s difficult to know what ‘the one’ is supposed to be like.
How are you supposed to know that you’ve found that perfect person for you?
Despite what Hollywood would have you believe, love at first sight is mostly a myth. It takes time to get to know someone and it’s a person’s heart and mind that we truly fall in love with– and that takes real human connection to know as opposed to some fictional psychic connection.
But there are ways to tell that you’ve found the one. One of the best is by looking at your communication.
When you fight, what do you fight about? What do you disagree on? Every good relationship has fights and disagreements. However, there are certain things you should never disagree on if you’re truly with the one. Or, at the very least, be able to easily come to an agreement on if you do.
Love consists in this, that two solitudes protect and touch and greet each other.
– Rainer Maria Rilke
These are four things you’ll never disagree on if you’re with ‘the one’.
1. Growth and progress
In the wrong relationship, growth is discouraged either because the other person lacks self-confidence or because they’re afraid that if you do grow they might lose you.
But the one will encourage you to push yourself further, to do more, and never hesitate to follow what is in your heart.
The one wants you to be happy and they understand that for you to do that you need to be true to yourself. And that means you must move forward. You must progress.
Family includes two aspects: raising your own family and your relationship with each other’s extended family.
Extended family is always a sore spot in any relationship, however strong. But if they’re the one you’ll both figure a way for it to work out, whether it’s where you’ll go for Christmas, Thanksgiving, or how often you’ll travel or they’ll visit.
Second, one of the most divisive factors in a relationship is when one person wants kids and the other doesn’t. There’s no reason this can’t happen to two people who are perfect for each other, though, so we come back to both people needing to be willing to do whatever it takes for one another.
And, after all, the mind and heart can change over time (and be influenced!).
Compared to true love, finances are unimportant– nothing more than a tool for daily living.
But the reality is that money issues can cause arguments even in the best relationships.
However, if you’re right for each other you’ll keep what is most important top-of-mind and come back to the main thing: being there for one another and living a happy life. And whatever you both need to do to be able to maintain or create that, you should be willing to do.
4. Where you’re going
Everyone has their own unique goals and dreams. However, if you’re with the one, you’ll both find a way to get to where both of you want to go (or are already going).
You won’t let simple squabbles keep either you or them from being able to realize each other’s dreams. You’ll be willing to do whatever it takes to make it happen for one another, with one another, because you want to be together no matter what.
Conflicts like this may come up regardless. But if they’re the right person for you, both people will be willing to do what it takes to find a resolution.