Kate Hudson has dated a lot of famous faces over the years, from Dax Shepard to Alex Rodriguez, but her first high-profile relationship was with The Black Crowes frontman Chris Robinson. The couple said “I do” in 2000 after less than a year of dating and welcomed son Ryder in January 2004, but unfortunately called it quits in 2006. 

The actress’ next major relationship came in 2010 when she started dating Muse frontman Matthew Bellamy. They got engaged in April 2011 and had son Bingham that July, but they ended their engagement in December 2014. The Almost Famous star later told Allure that they simply weren’t meant to be. “Relationships ending are painful, and you can choose to carry that or you can choose to reframe it,” she began, explaining, “If Matt and I had a great relationship, we would still be together, but we chose to move on because we had different visions of how we wanted to live our lives.”

That said, she knew it was important to “rebuild [a relationship] that would be the best thing for the kids” and it’s something she’s done successfully with both Robinson and Bellamy. So when she began dating musician and Lightwave Records co-founder Danny Fujikawa in 2016, he not only had to embrace Hudson’s two sons, but also the fact that her two exes would forever be an important part of her life. He did just that and today, Hudson and Fujikawa have a happy blended family and a strong union that’s built on mutual love, support, and respect. 

Kate Hudsonand Chris Robinson (Photo by Ferdaus Shamim/WireImage)

Here’s what we can learn from Kate Hudson and Danny Fujikawa’s relationship: 

Kate Hudson and Danny Fujikawa may have started dating in December 2016, but they’d been friends for over a decade before that. As the actress shared on her Instagram while celebrating the pair’s one-year anniversary back in 2017, she was just 23 years old when they first met and “enormously pregnant with Ryder. His stepsisters are my best friends @sarafoster [and] @erinfoster and so it goes we have been in the same circle for over a decade,” she wrote, revealing how everything changed when she least expected it.

While some unions aren’t meant to be, by the same token, others that are can find incredible ways of coming to fruition. “A year ago today, Danny took me on a hike and what I thought was just a hike with a family friend turned very quickly into an unexpected first date,” Hudson reminisced. “No moves were made on this first date. In fact, it took months for him to make a first move!” she continued, adding, “On our 15th year of knowing each other, we were able to open our hearts to each other to feel so much pure love and it’s been truly incredible!” 

Jump to 2018 and they grew their family with the arrival of daughter Rani Rose and, through it all, they’ve kept true to one main principle: family first.   

Kate Hudson and Danny Fujikawa’s approach to love and family is refreshing  

For Danny Fujikawa, dating Kate Hudson meant embracing all aspects of her life and he rose to the challenge. As the Bride Wars star told Women’s Health in 2019, he immediately accepted her unconventional family, as well as her career. “I’ve got the best man,” she gushed. “It’s the first time I feel like I have a real teammate in this. We’re able to pick up where the other one has to leave off,” she said, explaining, “If I have to go to a dinner meeting, he can be home. His number one priority is family.” Which is a good thing because it’s also hers. 

Speaking with TODAY in 2021, the How to Lose a Guy in 10 Days starlet revealed, “The only expectations I really have that are really high on my life is with my kids and with family stuff. Other than that […] I just let it go.” Which would explain why she’s so proud of her successful co-parenting with Chris Robinson and Matt Bellamy. As she once told The Telegraph:

It’s all about my kids. Which means I have to love their fathers, no matter what. And so I put my ego aside, I put aside any challenges that didn’t allow those relationships to last, and I love them — it doesn’t mean I have to be with them. I don’t know how I’ve pulled that off!

Rather than holding onto any animosity towards her exes, Hudson has always been a firm believer that “you’ve got to drop the ego” and put your children first. That’s because, sometimes, things don’t work out and that’s no reason to let anger take over. As she told Women’s Health, “Some people meet, have kids, and end up not being able to figure it out.”

By the same token, the actress told The Telegraph that hitting certain relationship goalposts isn’t a key to success. Sharing that she and Fujikawa will “probably” tie the knot, she said, “Marriage is definitely not a golden ticket – it’s not going to solve any challenges in a relationship.”    

Kate Hudson and Danny Fujikawa don’t let imperfections tarnish their union 

Despite their obvious bond, Kate Hudson and Danny Fujikawa have had their ups and downs, like any couple. But as the actress notes, that’s OK — it’s how you handle the tough(er) times that matters.

As she admitted on Watch What Happens Live in 2020, going into lockdown had some positive effects on their relationship, like showing her that “there’s nobody else I’d want to be quarantined with right now. He’s just the best,” she gushed, adding, “I think it’s positive for knowing that I’m with the right person.” However, there were also downsides. Getting candid about the realities of quarantine, she told TODAY that parenting during a pandemic wasn’t easy. “I wanna be, like, ‘Yeah, it’s so great and we’re figuring it out,’ but the reality is that there are days that are great, and there’s days that I have to remind myself to be grateful,” she confessed. “And when you have so many kids, sometimes you have those moments where you’re hiding in your bathroom going, ‘Please, please, get me out of here!'”  

And so, a big part of what has made her and Fujikawa’s relationship really work has been the way they approach disagreements. Because being with the right person means being able to work through the realities of life without tarnishing your bond. “When we have our disputes, I feel the thing that allows us to get through them is having the same ultimate goal, and that includes being in each other’s life,” she told Women’s Health. “It just feels so nice.” She also told People that “he makes me feel beautiful every single moment of the day, even when we have fought. I still feel loved,” she shared. “His devotion to the family unit makes me feel safe and confident and secure.”

Kate Hudson lives by some very important love advice from her mom 

Talk about major relationship inspo! Kate Hudson’s mom and stepdad — a.k.a Goldie Hawn and Kurt Russell — have been dating for nearly 40 years and, when they first got together in 1983, the actor immediately embraced the role of dad to both Kate Hudson and her brother, Oliver. Their biological father, Bill Hudson, wasn’t a part of his kids’ lives and Russell filled that void, no questions asked. It’s no surprise then that the actress has been inspired by both of her parents when it comes to relationships and, as she told People in 2020, “To live up to that is really the goal.”  

What’s more, Goldie Hawn has also given her daughter some invaluable advice, which has served her well through the years. “Mom always said to me, ‘Don’t you ever let a man dim your light,’” Hudson told the mag. “The second he starts to dim your light, you need to go inward and try to really, in the most loving way, look at the choices that you’re making — not blaming anybody else just looking inward,” she continued. Admitting, “I don’t have a very traditional setup,” she shared that by staying true to her beliefs she has “zero regrets of my life. I’ve never defined myself through the way that a man sees me. But I can define myself in the unit that we can create together,” she concluded.

There may be nothing traditional about Kate Hudson’s blended family, but that’s exactly why it works. Through all of her romantic ups and downs, she has stayed true to herself and her mother’s sage advice and traded in anger for cooperation. While it’s easy to dismiss an ex or hold a grudge, it’s much more beneficial to leave things on good terms, especially when kids are involved. If there’s one thing Kate Hudson can teach us all it’s the importance of putting family first and that yes, exes can remain a positive part of your life. And when the right person comes along (like Danny Fujikawa did), they’ll embrace all of it.