Life’s challenges and gifts come in the same wrapping
Raising a child with special needs takes a few things. It takes patience. It takes time. It takes love. It can take more money than raising a neurotypical child. It takes understanding. It takes not feeling sorry for yourself. Each situation is different depending on the child’s developmental delay but from my perspective, it also gives back so very much.
It not only takes patience, but it’s actually given me patience. It gives me love. It gives me understanding. It gives me lessons on a daily basis. There is no way that I would be the person I am or strive to be if it were not for my son. Not just autism but Elijah, himself, has taught me that the best of me is not even about me because who I strive to become determines who as well as what, I have to give to myself and others beyond my family.
It determines what my legacy will be, what value I bring to others. This is so because it takes a better version of yourself to help a child with special needs reach his/her full potential. Our son Elijah is 10 years old. He was diagnosed with autism at the age of three. Having had two daughters from her previous marriage, my wife was especially aware that there were certain things with development that seemed behind or missing. I did not see or notice anything. Oh yeah, it also helps to have a spouse who is a soldier of love, a warrior for her family and one who makes you better. I am a man blessed to have that, and more in my wife, Laura.
Through her diligence, tenacity, and research, we got Elijah into early intervention before the age of three for 1-2 years. I honestly do not recall for the simple fact that much of that period and a portion of the years that followed were a blur. When Elijah was roughly three years old, we became legal guardians to my sister in law’s four children then aged 4 to 11. That process much like raising any child with special needs took a lot. As a matter of fact, it became obvious that it would take so much that though we were just 4 years into our marriage, my wife gave me an out so to speak, by telling me that she would understand if I wanted to leave our marriage.
I was borderline offended at first because all I could think was that she had misunderstood the seriousness with which I took our vows. But that was making it about me. I did not realize until after the fact that this was the greatest example of not taking me for granted. We knew all along that certain life circumstances and choices would likely cause us to have to eventually step in and raise her sister’s children, but we did not anticipate it happening as suddenly as it did or when it did. I cannot imagine the life that would be had I thought for a second about taking my wife up on her offer to leave. Let me reiterate because it’s easy to misunderstand and think that I’ve said I cannot imagine what life would be like if I left.
The things that life can take from us, has an equal ability to give to us.
I said that I cannot (and refuse to) imagine a life where I even thought about leaving because the thought never once entered my mind, though I love my wife even more for thinking enough of me for offering. But to get back to my original point, the things that life can take from us, has an equal ability to give to us. If we choose to receive it. I’m not perfect, and I can’t say that I always have the right attitude or response to life’s challenges, but I’ve developed the ability to at least catch myself when that happens and make adjustments, especially when it comes to my children. ALL of them, but especially Elijah.
The extra care that he needs causes me to look at myself and find ways to be a better husband, father, and person. Each person's challenge in life is different, and as you read this, you may face things that are mountains compared to my hills, but I assure you that no matter what we face; how we respond to it is more important than the obstacle itself.
Military Dad Defends His 4 Little Daughters When Strangers Make This Rude Remark
Military Dad of 4 Daughters Defends His Girls When Strangers Make This Rude Remark
Austin von Letkemann is the military officer strangers feel "sorry" for — and the reason is infuriating.
Whenever the devoted father leaves the house with his four children, strangers can't help but notice the officer in uniform is holding hands with 4 adorable little girls. They will tell the traditionally "masculine" and "all American" dad they feel sorry for him, because he has no sons. This dad makes one thing very clear: They are his daughters, they aren't a burden.
In a passionate video, von Letkemann took to Instagram to share with his followers that the only thing that's "difficult" about being a girl dad — is clapping back to these sexist remarks over and over again.
They Mock His Daughters To Their Face
When strangers approach Austin von Letkemann and his four daughters, they don't always realize that their comments are being overheard. They seem oblivious to the fact that his girls understand every word. Von Letkemann describes how people will approach him and, without thinking, make remarks like "I'm sorry" or even joke about his lack of sons. What they don't realize is that these comments, intended to be light-hearted or humorous, can be deeply hurtful to his daughters. These strangers are not just disrespecting von Letkemann's choices as a father; they're also sending a message to his daughters that their presence is something to be pitied. It’s a message that von Letkemann won't stand for, and he's speaking out to defend his girls from these insensitive remarksSaying "Get Your Shotgun" Isn't Funny — It's Sexist
Another common comment that Austin von Letkemann encounters is the old "better get your shotgun ready" trope, often delivered with a smirk or a wink. This line is typically intended to suggest that a father with daughters should be on high alert to protect them from potential "suitors," implying that they are objects to be guarded rather than individuals with agency.
Von Letkemann finds this line of thinking outdated and sexist. In his viral Instagram video, he points out that these jokes are not just stale — they're damaging.
By suggesting that his daughters require armed protection, the joke reinforces the idea that women are inherently vulnerable and need to be shielded from men. Von Letkemann argues that instead of promoting this narrative, society should focus on teaching respect and consent, challenging these sexist tropes at their source.
Watch Austin von Letkemann's Video:
"If I Had A Fifth Child, I'd HOPE It Was A Girl" — One Dad's Message For Other Parents
Despite the constant remarks about his lack of sons, Austin von Letkemann is clear: He wouldn't trade his daughters for anything.
In fact, he told his Instagram followers that if he were to have a fifth child, he would hope for another girl. This declaration isn't just about doubling down on his pride in his family — it's a pointed response to those who see fathering daughters as a misfortune.
Von Letkemann's stance is a powerful one, rejecting the notion that a family is incomplete without sons. He encourages others to question the assumptions behind these comments and to appreciate the joy and fulfillment that his daughters bring. By sharing his story, von Letkemann hopes to create a more inclusive perspective on fatherhood, one that values daughters just as much as sons.