Beware the Guru Who Doesn't Practice What They Preach
In India, when a family encounters a problem regarding the behavior of their children, they don't consult a psychotherapist or a doctor. They go straight to the local guru. One of the reasons is that there is always a big shortage of doctors, especially in rural areas. So in a small village, there was a family who would often go to the local guru for help. One day, the mother and father came to the guru with their nine-year-old child. The father told the guru, "Master, our son is a wonderful boy and we love him very much. But he has a terrible problem, a weakness for sweets that is ruining his teeth and health. We've tried to reason with him, argued, pleaded, used discipline but nothing worked. He just doesn't listen and keeps on consuming an enormous amount of sweets. Can you help us?" The guru's answer left the father surprised. He said, "Go now and get back in exactly two weeks." Since the mantra in the village is that you don't argue with the guru, the family listened and obeyed. The weeks passed and the family came back to the guru with their child. And the guru said, "Good, now we can proceed." But the father stopped and asked, "Won't you tell us please why you sent us away for two weeks? You have never done that before." The guru replied, "I needed the two weeks because I, too, have had a lifelong weakness for sweets. Until I had confronted and resolved that issue within myself, I was not ready to deal with your son." People usually don't like this story. Beware the Guru Who Doesn't Practice What They Preach What you do speaks so loudly that I cannot hear what you say. - Ralph Waldo Emerson We live in the world of self-help gurus, life coaches, and preachers. Everyone knows everything and wants to tell you how you should live your life. And yes, there are people out there who are truly great, and you should listen to them. Because they have "been there, done that," and can offer important guidance in a certain situation. But you need to beware of the wannabe life coaches who preach but don't practice it for themselves. Would you trust a broke financial manager? Or an overweight personal trainer? Of course not. Because they don't practice what they preach. Preaching is easy. You go and read a couple of books and suddenly, you are the know-it-all master. Preaching comes from knowledge, which is half of an important equation. But by itself, it doesn't mean much. You need the other side of the coin with it, and that is experience. Experience without knowledge is blind, but knowledge without experience is a mere intellectual play. - Immanuel Kant This is important, because skill equals knowledge times a couple thousand repetitions. To truly know something means to know the theory, but also to live the practice. Because in theory, theory and practice are the same. In practice, they are not. Mary in the black and white room Mary is a scientist, and her specialist subject is color. She knows everything there is to know about colors. The effects they have on neurology, the wavelengths, reach. Literally, every possible property a color can have, Mary knows about it. And Mary has a favorite color. It is blue. Mary is just fascinated with the color blue. The color blue just seems to have the perfect wavelength and a soothing impact on the brain's neurology. But she lives in a black and white room. She was born and raised there. Even the TV that she has is a black-and-white TV. That is her only way of observing the outside world. So Mary has never actually seen any colors, and all her knowledge of them is second-hand. Then one day, the door to the outside world opens, and Mary walks out. She sees the blue sky for the first time. At that moment, she learns something that all her studies couldn't tell her. She learns what it feels like to see the color blue. This was something that couldn't be taught or conveyed. This was something that needed to be experienced to be understood. Who will you let guide you? Remember in the end to find a mentor who has the right knowledge, but has also been in the trenches. Someone who just preaches but doesn't practice is dangerous. But someone who just practices with no knowledge and theory is blind. So, who will you follow after this? Tell me in the comments.
The Sacred 3 Findings of Life: the 1%, the Tribe and the System
Life is all about discovery. It is sometimes the things we find within ourselves, and sometimes external. There are things we add to ourselves that make us better, and things that we remove to make us more authentic. In all of this findings, there are three crucial ones that we seek our entire life. These three are the 1%, the Tribe and the System. So let's get right into it. The Sacred 3 Findings of Life: The 1%, the Tribe and the System The soul which has no fixed purpose in life is lost; to be everywhere, is to be nowhere. - Michel de Montaigne The 1% We are mostly unaware that we are searching for our 1%. When asked what we want in life, we respond with, "love, happiness, success." But how we get these things often remains unknown to us. To get love, happiness, or success, we need to figure out what drives us. And these drivers are always based on our internal well-being, on our internal sources of motivation. And here is the catch. Nobody can figure out what your internal motivation is except you. It is unique and authentic for every single one of us on Earth. You need to go on an internal adventure to find what it is that you deeply care about. You need to figure what is your own personal 1%. When you discover that, everything else becomes noise in the background -- "things you really, truly, absolutely, don't give a fuck about," as Mark Manson would say. And you become a leader of yourself. So go on an adventure. Try stuff out, see what you like and dislike. Ask yourself why. Reinvent yourself. Become true to yourself and you will figure out your 1%. And when you obtain it, your life will never be the same again. You will see the world through different eyes. And you will know why you were put on this Earth. But knowing this is not enough. There are big obstacles ahead which you will need to deal with to be able to live out your purpose. The Tribe You are the average of 5 people you spend the most time with. - Jim Rohn Figuring out your 1% is only the first step. When you figure it out, you need to live it. And this is where it gets super hard. Because you need to change your surroundings. You need to change the people whom you hang out with. Because like it or not, you are the average of the five people you spend the most time with. And if you are spending time with people who only drag you down and take a dump on your life goals, vision, and purpose, you will eventually start to do the same to your goals, vision, and purpose. We are created to learn from osmosis. This basically means that you copy what people around you do. That's why Buddhism is not the major religion in Italy, nor Catholicism in India. And it's why you need to find a group of people who support you in this endeavor. You have to have clear standards and criteria when picking your friends. Now that you understand your purpose, you can align your tribe with your 1%. And you need to sever the ties with people who just hold you down. I know that this is hard, and it sucks in the beginning. But it is the difference between just knowing what your purpose is and never achieving it, and knowing what it is and actually fulfilling it. If you don't believe me, believe Jay-Z, Michael Beckwith or many others who shared the same process in their books. Once you find your Tribe, you'll arrive at the last finding. The System You know what you need to do. You have people who support you. And now, it's all about making it happen. For this, we need the System. The System is a collection of habits and rituals you do daily to live a purposeful life and achieve your life's vision. We need a system because our willpower depletes easily, so we can't rely on it in the long haul. The System helps us develop habits that will bring us a successful life, however we define that. The System is usually based on just a couple of things you do every day which brings you closer and closer to your vision. For Warren Buffet it's reading, for James Altucher it's writing, and for Tony Robbins, it's practicing gratitude in the morning. These kinds of habits are called keystone habits, because their positive effects ripple through every areas of your life. Here, you just need to define what kind of keystone habit will help you most in your 1%. Maybe it's reading, maybe writing, maybe both. For me, it's both reading and writing every single day. But that doesn't have to be for you. Remember, it has to align with your 1%. The 3 findings When you pursue your journey and figure out your 1%, your life will change. Then, you will find your Tribe which helps and supports you and makes you feel safe. And at the end, you will find your System. With these, you will conquer your goals and achieve your vision. So what are you waiting for? Go and find your 1%, your Tribe, and your System. And tell me about it in the comments.