Quality time together with your significant other is amazing, especially if you have similar interests. Spending leisurely Saturdays strolling in a park and then grabbing appetizers and drinks can be wonderful, but there can be a flip-side to all this togetherness.
Feeling like you must do everything with your partner will only foster co-dependence and clinginess. This sort of dynamic will stifle growth in both partners, and could make either one feel like they are being suffocated by the relationship.
Experts say that having your own life outside of your relationship also can enhance your bond with your partner. Pursuing your own interests, spending time solo, or hanging with your friends can create lasting benefits and will strengthen your relationship.
Who wants to be co-dependent, when you can be an independent power couple?
Here are 5 reasons space will help your relationship:
1. It amps up the romance factor
As they say: "absence makes the heart go fonder." This phrase is very true, and space will give you a chance to do that.
“A misconception about relationships is that when you are in one you need to be glued to one another which could not be further from the truth. If you’re always around each other, you don’t have a chance to both miss and appreciate each other,” says Sophia Reed PhD NCC, a certified counselor and author. “Often, having some space will bring both.”
2. Stop codependence and clinginess
A relationship is great, says Reed, but it is not your saving grace, and the moment it becomes that, you have a problem because you are dependent upon your partner.
“If by chance the relationship does not work out the dependent person is at risk for depression or bad after-effects because they have made their partner their entire world,” she says. “Space helps each person stay grounded and less dependent on each other which is healthy.”
3. Increased appreciation for your partner
Space in a relationship can be very beneficial for couples who have gotten too close or too accustomed to really see what makes their partner special.
“The reasoning behind this is that it gives each of you time to appreciate each other,” explains Laura F. Dabney, MD, a relationship psychotherapist. “If you have outside interests or time away from each other, it will also make you more aware of each other’s schedules and time.”
It's a great chance to reconnect with what you loved about your partner in the first place. Dabney also says that time apart helps create balanced relationships.
“Having time apart will really help each person keep their own sense of identity,” she adds.
4. Get over the fear factor
Even if space sounds scary, the concept will vary, and what “space” looks like will be different for each couple.
“While it can be intimidating, having space can promote strength in a relationship,” says GinaMarie Guarino, a licensed mental health counselor. “Space promotes independence and autonomy, which minimizes the risk of codependence and other kinds of dependency issues. It can also help to prevent boredom in a relationship, as each partner looks forward to seeing each other and spending quality time together.”
5. Concentrate on making you better
Space creates the opportunity to be your best self -- for both you and your partner.
“Individuals who are whole and complete in themselves are better partners in a relationship because they realize and understand that they are personally responsible for their own happiness,” says relationship expert Tiffany Toombs. “And in taking time and space to do the things that make you personally happy, you can better contribute emotionally, energetically and spiritually to your partner’s life and to enhance their life.”
Military Dad Defends His 4 Little Daughters When Strangers Make This Rude Remark
Military Dad of 4 Daughters Defends His Girls When Strangers Make This Rude Remark
Austin von Letkemann is the military officer strangers feel "sorry" for — and the reason is infuriating.
Whenever the devoted father leaves the house with his four children, strangers can't help but notice the officer in uniform is holding hands with 4 adorable little girls. They will tell the traditionally "masculine" and "all American" dad they feel sorry for him, because he has no sons. This dad makes one thing very clear: They are his daughters, they aren't a burden.
In a passionate video, von Letkemann took to Instagram to share with his followers that the only thing that's "difficult" about being a girl dad — is clapping back to these sexist remarks over and over again.
They Mock His Daughters To Their Face
When strangers approach Austin von Letkemann and his four daughters, they don't always realize that their comments are being overheard. They seem oblivious to the fact that his girls understand every word. Von Letkemann describes how people will approach him and, without thinking, make remarks like "I'm sorry" or even joke about his lack of sons. What they don't realize is that these comments, intended to be light-hearted or humorous, can be deeply hurtful to his daughters. These strangers are not just disrespecting von Letkemann's choices as a father; they're also sending a message to his daughters that their presence is something to be pitied. It’s a message that von Letkemann won't stand for, and he's speaking out to defend his girls from these insensitive remarksSaying "Get Your Shotgun" Isn't Funny — It's Sexist
Another common comment that Austin von Letkemann encounters is the old "better get your shotgun ready" trope, often delivered with a smirk or a wink. This line is typically intended to suggest that a father with daughters should be on high alert to protect them from potential "suitors," implying that they are objects to be guarded rather than individuals with agency.
Von Letkemann finds this line of thinking outdated and sexist. In his viral Instagram video, he points out that these jokes are not just stale — they're damaging.
By suggesting that his daughters require armed protection, the joke reinforces the idea that women are inherently vulnerable and need to be shielded from men. Von Letkemann argues that instead of promoting this narrative, society should focus on teaching respect and consent, challenging these sexist tropes at their source.
Watch Austin von Letkemann's Video:
"If I Had A Fifth Child, I'd HOPE It Was A Girl" — One Dad's Message For Other Parents
Despite the constant remarks about his lack of sons, Austin von Letkemann is clear: He wouldn't trade his daughters for anything.
In fact, he told his Instagram followers that if he were to have a fifth child, he would hope for another girl. This declaration isn't just about doubling down on his pride in his family — it's a pointed response to those who see fathering daughters as a misfortune.
Von Letkemann's stance is a powerful one, rejecting the notion that a family is incomplete without sons. He encourages others to question the assumptions behind these comments and to appreciate the joy and fulfillment that his daughters bring. By sharing his story, von Letkemann hopes to create a more inclusive perspective on fatherhood, one that values daughters just as much as sons.