What does it mean to be in a truly deep, meaningful relationship?
What should you look for in a partner and how do you know you’ve found something worth your time and effort?
These are questions we all ask at some point in our life, whether we realize it consciously or not. After all, we’re social creatures and so a huge part of our happiness is dependent upon on our relationships, particularly those of a romantic kind. If we can know what to look for in advance, we’ll save ourselves a lot of time and heartache.
Real magic in relationships means an absence of judgment of others.
– Wayne Dyer
So, what should you look for in a meaningful relationship? While somewhat subjective, there are a few factors which I believe are critical for any meaningful relationship that ever hopes to go the long haul.
If you have these things, you’ll not only find great happiness with each other, you’ll have the ability to weather any storm that comes at you:
Trust (or the potential for it)
It can be said a million times and still wouldn’t have been said enough. Do you feel like you can trust your partner? If not, they might need to go.
Sure, sometimes past relationships can make it hard for us to trust others, but that’s not what I’m talking about here. Do they do things which lead you to question their loyalty to you? If they do (or have) this can become a deal breaker quite quickly.
Acceptance of each other’s imperfections
Imperfections– we all have them and we all feel insecure about them.
However, a true, meaningful relationship should feel like a safe place where you can let go and be yourself. You should feel like you can open up about your imperfections and that the other person accepts you not only despite them but in some ways because of them.
However, more than simply being accepting, in a meaningful relationship, each person is willing and desires to help the other person work through their imperfections to get to a better place.
The truth is, most of us have real issues or challenges that affect us on a very deep level and we need others we can connect with to help us work through them.
The willingness (and ability) to be yourself
How comfortable are you in your relationship? Whether you’re in one now or want to know what to look for when you think you have found the right one, pay attention to how the other person makes you feel.
Do they make you feel accepted for who you are or do you feel as though you need to maintain a ruse just to keep up the relationship? One behavior is the sign of a healthy relationship while the other is wholly unhealthy. You’ll intuitively feel the difference if you pay close attention.
And an undying support
Some partners work together closely each and every day, working to build businesses, create, or serve. Other couples prefer to keep their work separate and have family life act as a sort of sanctuary for whatever happens outside.
While it all depends on what you and your partner do or will prefer, one thing that isn’t negotiable is an undying support for each other’s efforts.
More than ever in a world where both men and women work to pursue their dreams together in a shared space, both partners have to be willing to throw it down for the other. Keep in mind that this could quite simply be a verbal confirmation of support, often times nothing else is needed.
However, if an opportunity presents itself the other partner needs to be willing to do whatever it takes to allow the other to take full advantage of it. It’s one of the coolest things in the world to see two people helping to push each other forward, not to mention one of the most powerful as well.
We all seek meaningful relationships, but most of us go about it all wrong. It’s not our fault, the conditioning we’ve received through decades of life has left us needing love, confidence, security, and spontaneity in various quantities and that often affects the way we pick our relationships in a way that ends up hurting us.
However, for a meaningful and successful relationship, you need to look for someone you can trust, who accepts your flaws and allows you to be yourself, and who supports you no matter what. If you can find someone like that, you’ve discovered something far more valuable than gold can ever be.