Dave Chappelle may be one of the most popular comedians in the world, but to his wife Elaine, he's just Dave.
Chappelle had his big break with his Comedy Central Show Chappelle Show which ran from 2003 to 2005. The show was enormously popular and put Chappelle on the map. Chappelle’s Show was scheduled to have a third season after the success of the first two seasons but that never happened.
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Instead, Chappelle famously walked away from the series and a $50 million paycheck. He abruptly left during production in 2006, effectively breaking his contract with Comedy Central. He was reportedly unhappy with the direction the show had taken and needed to step away.
But there has been one person who has been with the comedian through it all and that's his wife, Elaine.
Dave and Elaine Chappelle Prioritize Family Over Money
In an interview with Time, Chappelle spoke about moving to Ohio and walking away from his show, saying, "Coming here, I don't have the distractions of fame. It quiets the ego down. I'm interested in the kind of person I've got to become. I want to be well-rounded, and the industry is a place of extremes. I want to be well-balanced. I've got to check my intentions, man.”
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There was much speculation during this time in Chappelle’s life. Fans couldn’t fathom the idea that he’d walk away from his popular and successful show and $50 million. People thought he must have a drug or alcohol problem. Others thought it was a mental health issue that led comedian Dave Chappelle to walk away from it all. That wasn’t the case at all. Chappelle simply reprioritized his life in a way that was better for himself and his family.
Through the media circus that followed Dave Chappelle’s wife Elaine Mendoza stood by him. Dave and Elaine have been married for 21 years. They tied the knot in 2001 and have two sons, Sulayman and Ibrahim, and one daughter, Sanaa.
Who is Elaine Chappelle?
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Dave Chappelle’s wife Elaine Mendoza was born on August 31, 1974, to devout Christian Filipino parents. (Dave converted to Islam in 1991.) She grew up in Brooklyn and according to various sources, once planned to become a professional chef. Dave and Elaine Chappelle met more than 20 years ago, so she would have been in her 20s. After meeting and falling in love with Dave Chappelle, Elaine chose to devote herself to raising the couple’s three children.
How Did Dave Chappelle and Elaine Meet?
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During an interview with Howard Stern in the early 2000s, Dave Chappelle revealed that he met his then-girlfriend Elaine Mendoza in Brooklyn and at the time he said she was pregnant with his baby. He said that he was immediately interested in her, but she took some time to get to know Dave before committing to the relationship.
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He also revealed that she was Filipino, which led Stern and his co-host Robin Quivers to make some distasteful jokes about Asian stereotypes. Up until this point Dave Chappelle had been a regular guest on Stern’s show and even credited the exposure Stern gave him with helping his career. After they made those so-called jokes about the future Elaine Chappelle, he has continually refused to ever appear on Stern’s show again. Though he publicly says it’s because the show tapes too early in the morning, it feels like he's showing where his loyalties lie – with his wife Elaine Chappelle.
Elaine is Dave Chappelle’s Support System
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Dave and Elaine Chappelle have a strong marriage that has lasted more than two decades so far. Over the years, Dave Chappelle has made many comments about how his wife is his support system. In his final interview with Howard Stern, Chappelle said, “She was with me when I was poor.”
For a celebrity like Chappelle, it is especially important to have a strong support system in place. Fans and the media can be brutal to a public figure like Elaine Chappelle’s husband. She has been with Dave through some rocky parts of his career including when he walked away from Chappelle’s Show and the more recent controversy over the anti-trans content in his standup routine.
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He appreciates the perspective Elaine Chappelle brings to his life and said, "My wife, if it gets real bad, she’ll let me know, like, ‘Oh, you should look into this.’ But for the most part, I try not to pay attention to it because you don’t want to be careful as a comedian. I try to keep my business small enough so it can still be authentic enough.”
Speaking of that $50 million Chappelle walked away from when he quit Chapelle’s Show and voided his contract with Comedy Central – Chappelle did an interview with Conan O’Brien in 2006 during which he talked about it, saying, “My wife’s still a little salty… She’s not mad at me, but don’t think you’re going to walk away from $50 million and your wife’s just gonna be cool with it.”
Where the Married Couple is Today
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Dave and Elaine Chappelle and their three children live on a 65-acre farm in Yellow Springs, Ohio, which is located about 20 miles from the Dayton Metropolitan area. In 2006, Chappelle said, “I used to be cable’s hottest star and now I’m just a Yellow Springs guy. It turns out you don't need $50 million to live around these parts, just a nice smile and a kind way about you. You guys are the best neighbors ever. That's why I came back and that's why I'm staying.”
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Chappelle grew up in Yellow Springs, where his father was the dean of students at Antioch College.
By all accounts, Dave and Elaine Chappelle are living a peaceful, quiet, and normal life in Ohio with their children. She keeps out of the spotlight and doesn’t have any social media accounts. They appear to be a grounded couple with mutual love and respect for each other and that’s a beautiful thing.
How Death Can Be Life's Greatest Gift
If you were told that you only had a couple of months, days, or hours left to live, would you regret anything? When reflecting on your life, is there anything you would change?
Life is precious, yet temporary. You never know the exact moment when you will die, so you need to live as if you were to die tomorrow.
How Death Can Be Life's Greatest Gift
In my nursing career, I have met many people who were suffering from a life-threatening illness, and who were soon to meet death. They did not know the exact moment they would die, but they knew their time was short. There was no longer any hope that they would overcome their illness, as it was only a matter of time before their body would fail them.
I could tell that some of these individuals had trouble confronting the idea of death. I could see the pain in their eyes, and could hear the anguish in their voice. These individuals were fearful of what was to come, and were disheartened with their current situation. They were angry with their life and knew that their time was running out.
READ: Gain the Strength to Accept the Things You Cannot Change
Yet on the opposite end of the spectrum, I've met individuals who have chosen to face death with bravery and grace. I have been inspired by the way some patients courageously met death with a smile on their face. Even through the pain and suffering, they remained optimistic, and took everything in stride.
What you leave behind
I believe that the patients who accepted death accepted it because they were accepting of their life. They were content with the idea of passing on because they were content with how they had lived. Because they were satisfied with their life, it was easier for them to leave it.
Although everyone deals with death differently, what is universal is the aspect of death. We are all going to die -- it’s how we approach the idea of death that distinguishes us.
When you approach the end of your life, which type of person will you be? Will you be the one who looks at your life with displeasure and discontent? Or are you going to be the one who nears death with a smile because you are incredibly grateful for the life you've lived?
How will you choose to live?
Having the knowledge that you are going to die is one of the greatest gifts that you have been given. Thinking about your imminent death forces you to reflect on your life and the way that you've been living. By doing so, you gain clarity and become empowered to shape your life in the way you choose.
READ: How Writing Your Own Eulogy Can Help You Follow Your Heart and Live Your Best Life
If you are unsatisfied with life, then decide to change it. Is there someone you’ve been meaning to call but you've been putting it off? Call them! Have you been dreaming of visiting the south of France but are hesitant to purchase a ticket because you think its too expensive? Save up your money and purchase the ticket! Are you working in a spirit-sucking job that you hate and are only staying because you think you have no other option? Do your research and change jobs!
Be the one who strives to take advantage of the time they have by choosing to live life to the fullest. Stop procrastinating on your to-do lists and putting things off for “some other time.” Be grateful for what you do have, and stop wasting time being ungrateful for what you don’t. Don't finally knock on death’s door with unfulfilled wishes and dreams, so start making the steps to ensure that doesn’t happen.