No one said parenting is easy, but thanks to social media many moms and dads can share stories that make them feel less alone. Of course, when you take anything online, you need to weigh the good with the bad, which one mom was reminded of when she posted about a creative solution to her daughter not cleaning her room.
While some people applauded her and said they might copy her tactics, others were against it. And one person even reported her to social services.
Enough Is Enough
Alice Velasquez was done telling her teen daughter Tahlia to clean her room. No matter how many times she asked her to pick her things up, there was garbage, dirty clothes, clean clothes, and sporting equipment everywhere. Words weren’t working, so she finally came up with another solution.
Velasquez put every single one of her daughter’s belongings from the floor into garbage bags. She didn’t sort anything, and she didn’t throw anything out. What was on the floor went into those bags exactly as it was. Then, she told Tahlia she could buy the bags back one at a time for $25.
The twist was that the only way Tahlia could earn money was to do chores around the house.
“So $25 could buy a bag of dirty clothes, it could buy a bag of trash, or it could buy soccer gear. #MayTheOddsBeEverInYourFavor,” Velasquez wrote in a since-deleted post, as per Stuff.
Unexpected Backlash
Some praised the mom for her unique solution. Others thought she was being too extreme. The post was shared thousands of times, and as more people weighed in, Velasquez eventually offered an update.
“I guess the downside of posting my parenting choices and having it go 'viral' is all the haters... I do not know when I last received such hateful messages!!” she wrote.
Velasquez revealed that one person had even called social services over the post, despite the fact that they didn’t actually know her or her family. She added that this was her taking an active role in parenting and that she was raising her kids to have respect, chores, and responsibility. They are also loved, well cared for, and involved with school, church, and family activities.
“When I asked her (repeatedly) to clean her room, I expect to be respected in my request,” the mom continued. “If her teacher or boss asks her to complete a task and she refuses, there will be consequences. That is life, and that is how we all contribute to society.”
A Successful Experiment
Despite the negative backlash, Velasquez stood behind her actions and revealed they worked really well for her family. Not only did her daughter work to earn her things back, but her siblings also pitched in and volunteered for extra chores to help her get her belongings even faster.
The mom said that people could judge her but she is personally very proud of her kids. “Not only was this a lesson for my oldest daughter, but a great family building exercise, too,” she wrote.
“[We look for a] creative solution that can later be looked back at and laughed at by all parties, but yet instills lessons that will stay with both parties and hopefully be a memory, learning opportunity, and bonding experience all rolled into one,” she continued.
“I stood by it when I posted it, and I stand even taller by it now that I have seen the results in my children.”
We’re All Just Doing Our Best
There’s a reason they say parenting takes a village. There are many rewards to being a parent, but it can also be challenging. Many parents question whether their decisions are the right ones, and look to others for advice when they’re out of answers. These days, many people also ask for help online.
That’s why it’s important to not judge other parents and to try and be supportive. If you come across something that is truly concerning it should always be reported, however parenting choices that are meant to teach life lessons in a positive way should be applauded.
After all, as parents, we’re all just doing our best to raise decent humans. And we could all use a little help along the way.
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Woman holding her child's clothing.Marla Branyan / @marla_branyan
