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Instead, Chappelle famously walked away from the series and a $50 million paycheck. He abruptly left during production in 2006, effectively breaking his contract with Comedy Central. He was reportedly unhappy with the direction the show had taken and needed to step away.
But there has been one person who has been with the comedian through it all and that's his wife, Elaine.
Dave and Elaine Chappelle Prioritize Family Over Money
In an interview with Time, Chappelle spoke about moving to Ohio and walking away from his show, saying, "Coming here, I don't have the distractions of fame. It quiets the ego down. I'm interested in the kind of person I've got to become. I want to be well-rounded, and the industry is a place of extremes. I want to be well-balanced. I've got to check my intentions, man.”
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There was much speculation during this time in Chappelle’s life. Fans couldn’t fathom the idea that he’d walk away from his popular and successful show and $50 million. People thought he must have a drug or alcohol problem. Others thought it was a mental health issue that led comedian Dave Chappelle to walk away from it all. That wasn’t the case at all. Chappelle simply reprioritized his life in a way that was better for himself and his family.
Through the media circus that followed Dave Chappelle’s wife Elaine Mendoza stood by him. Dave and Elaine have been married for 21 years. They tied the knot in 2001 and have two sons, Sulayman and Ibrahim, and one daughter, Sanaa.
Who is Elaine Chappelle?
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Dave Chappelle’s wife Elaine Mendoza was born on August 31, 1974, to devout Christian Filipino parents. (Dave converted to Islam in 1991.) She grew up in Brooklyn and according to various sources, once planned to become a professional chef. Dave and Elaine Chappelle met more than 20 years ago, so she would have been in her 20s. After meeting and falling in love with Dave Chappelle, Elaine chose to devote herself to raising the couple’s three children.
How Did Dave Chappelle and Elaine Meet?
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During an interview with Howard Stern in the early 2000s, Dave Chappelle revealed that he met his then-girlfriend Elaine Mendoza in Brooklyn and at the time he said she was pregnant with his baby. He said that he was immediately interested in her, but she took some time to get to know Dave before committing to the relationship.
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He also revealed that she was Filipino, which led Stern and his co-host Robin Quivers to make some distasteful jokes about Asian stereotypes. Up until this point Dave Chappelle had been a regular guest on Stern’s show and even credited the exposure Stern gave him with helping his career. After they made those so-called jokes about the future Elaine Chappelle, he has continually refused to ever appear on Stern’s show again. Though he publicly says it’s because the show tapes too early in the morning, it feels like he's showing where his loyalties lie – with his wife Elaine Chappelle.
Elaine is Dave Chappelle’s Support System
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Dave and Elaine Chappelle have a strong marriage that has lasted more than two decades so far. Over the years, Dave Chappelle has made many comments about how his wife is his support system. In his final interview with Howard Stern, Chappelle said, “She was with me when I was poor.”
For a celebrity like Chappelle, it is especially important to have a strong support system in place. Fans and the media can be brutal to a public figure like Elaine Chappelle’s husband. She has been with Dave through some rocky parts of his career including when he walked away from Chappelle’s Show and the more recent controversy over the anti-trans content in his standup routine.
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He appreciates the perspective Elaine Chappelle brings to his life and said, "My wife, if it gets real bad, she’ll let me know, like, ‘Oh, you should look into this.’ But for the most part, I try not to pay attention to it because you don’t want to be careful as a comedian. I try to keep my business small enough so it can still be authentic enough.”
Speaking of that $50 million Chappelle walked away from when he quit Chapelle’s Show and voided his contract with Comedy Central – Chappelle did an interview with Conan O’Brien in 2006 during which he talked about it, saying, “My wife’s still a little salty… She’s not mad at me, but don’t think you’re going to walk away from $50 million and your wife’s just gonna be cool with it.”
Where the Married Couple is Today
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Dave and Elaine Chappelle and their three children live on a 65-acre farm in Yellow Springs, Ohio, which is located about 20 miles from the Dayton Metropolitan area. In 2006, Chappelle said, “I used to be cable’s hottest star and now I’m just a Yellow Springs guy. It turns out you don't need $50 million to live around these parts, just a nice smile and a kind way about you. You guys are the best neighbors ever. That's why I came back and that's why I'm staying.”
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Chappelle grew up in Yellow Springs, where his father was the dean of students at Antioch College.
By all accounts, Dave and Elaine Chappelle are living a peaceful, quiet, and normal life in Ohio with their children. She keeps out of the spotlight and doesn’t have any social media accounts. They appear to be a grounded couple with mutual love and respect for each other and that’s a beautiful thing.
Be a Rainbow in Somebody Else's Cloud
Most of Maya Angelou's life's work was rooted in her love for others. To millions she was (and is) a precious orb of light in an otherwise dark room. An influence to the likes of Barack Obama, Alicia Keys and Tupac Shakur, one of her firmest intentions was to always be "a rainbow in somebody else's cloud."
Be a Rainbow in Somebody Else's Cloud
How do we be a rainbow in someone else's cloud? We offer ourselves to them. Our whole selves. We realize that we were put here for a greater purpose than to just serve ourselves. That we were put here to also be of service to others. To extend nourishment as much as we hoard it.
Have you ever been financially broke -- and yet, almost by magic, somebody was there to lend you money? Or instead experienced the death of a loved one -- while one person stayed with you patiently through your grief? These people were your rainbows.
And if you haven't had an experience like this, then that is all the more reason to give someone what you wish someone would have given you in a time of crisis.
Angelou's rainbow, and how she found her voice
During her five years of muteness as a child, one of Maya Angelou's rainbows was her grandmother. "You're going to be a teacher," she told Angelou. "Sister, you're going to teach all over this world." Maya thought in her head at the time, "This poor, ignorant woman – doesn't she know I will never speak?"
Yet, in her lifetime, Maya Angelou indeed did lecture at leading educational institutions around the world; her grandmother was right.
When we have no belief left in ourselves, sometimes we need somebody else to provide that belief.
Sometimes we need a rainbow in a cloud of our own.
Fill your own cup, that it may overflow
And it's easy to confuse being a rainbow in someone else's cloud with being a people-pleaser. But the difference between the two is that the latter demands too much of you, while the former demands just enough. People-pleasers expend themselves by giving away food even when they are still hungry themselves. If you are being a rainbow, however, you aren't doing so at the expense of yourself.
Rainbows don't replace clouds; they simply shine through a fraction of them to say "I'm here."
Regarding the Bible quotation, "My cup runneth over," Iyanla Vanzant said that in order to keep your cup full when giving to others, you have to make it clear that "What comes out of the cup is for y'all; what's in the cup is mine." It's the idea that when your cup is so full it's overflowing, you can give the excess to others guilt-free because you already have enough.
The many faces of giving
Just because you are not expending all of your energy to get rid of the cloud or stop the rain or drag the sun out, that does not mean you are not doing enough for the person involved. Sometimes all we humans require is an attentive listener, a positive quote to read, or a cup of coffee made by another hand. These small gestures are enough.
Remember that you were put here to be your best self for a purpose bigger than yourself. Sometimes we forget this duty. We treat it like a burden. Stop treating it like one. Find someone in your life who you know to be struggling and, without expecting anything in return, be a rainbow in their cloud.
Only you know how.
In the words of Thic Nhat Hanh: "The most precious gift we can offer others is our presence. When mindfulness embraces those we love, they will bloom like flowers."