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Will & Jada Pinkett Smith Memoir Drama What Happens When Unconditional Love Turns Toxic
Celebrities

Will & Jada Pinkett Smith Memoir Drama What Happens When Unconditional Love Turns Toxic

A-list couple Will Smith and Jada Pinkett Smith are putting themselves and their relationship at the center of controversial and converging headlines once again. Jada Pinkett Smith had viewers scratching their heads when on a series of back-to-back appearances on the TODAY show, she dropped another bomb. Her and husband of 26 years, Will Smith, have been secretly separated since 2016. But only a few days later she revised her statement during a second "damage control" appearance.In Her New Tell-All Memoir, Jada Reveals She and Will Smith Were Only Pretending to Be Married?Ahead of her upcoming memoir Worthy, Jada Pinkett Smith, 52, revealed in yet another "exclusive" interview that she and husband Will Smith, 55, have been "living separate lives" for 7 years. The Red Table Host disclosed the info while discussing the infamous slap at The Oscars. The one we all know too well.Smith infamously slapped Chris Rock in the face after the comedian called Jada "G.I. Jane" in his monologue – a reference to Pinkett Smith's shaved head. At the time Jada was open about her struggle with alopecia.Fans were quick to point out that Will Smith first seems to laugh at the joke while Jada sits back and rolls her eyes. The camera then cuts back to Chris Rock, but by the time it returns back to Will Smith – his entire demeanour had radically changed. Jada Pinkett Smith Does Damage Control Apparently, though, Jada Pinkett Smith wanted to set the record straight and inform the public that she had nothing to do with her now disgraced husband's actions.“I did that eye roll not so much for me — and I think this is really important — but the fact that there could be a jab at alopecia.” - Jada Pinkett Smith, explains her reaction to Chris Rock jokeAfter storming the stage, Smith returned to his seat, screaming, "keep my wife's name out your f**king mouth" However, according to Jada, being called his "wife" was more shocking than the slap itself! Jada and Will Have Lived Separately For Seven YearsIn her initial interview with the TODAY show, Jada Pinkett Smith confirmed, that despite their red carpet appearances and PDA over the years that she and Will Smith "had not called each other husband and wife for years".Jada Pinkett's curious claims are only further confused by her ambiguous language. The TODAY Show host wants to make sure she has it right, so she asked for clarification. Jada Pinkett Smith definitively says while they are not "divorced on paper", because she "made a promise" (weird logic, but ok)--she and Will Smith live "completely separate lives", and are for all intents and purposes, divorced. Just minus the paperwork. "I made a promise there will never be a reason for us to get a divorce. We will work through whatever. And I haven't been able to break that promise."- Jada Pinkett Smith, TODAY ShowMedia outlets were quick to report on Jada Pinkett Smith's shocking interview, and it wasn't the most flattering coverage to say the least. The actress turned author received lots of negative press following her grand reveal. It was hard for fans not to feel deceived by a public figure who so often spouts that she is completely honest and authentic.Following the backlash, Pinkett Smith appeared for a second time on the TODAY Show to clear the air, that she had failed to clear the first time. Pinkett Smith frustratingly puts the confusion on the hosts shoulders for the "misunderstanding". She doubles back on her statement that she and Will Smith are "working hard" and are not separated, instead saying Will is her "great love" and they are in a "deep healing space". "The whole journey has brought Will and I closer in such an authentic way," Jada backtracks.Naturally, it was hard not to feel like Jada Pinkett Smith was washing her hands clean of all wrong doing, and that once again, disappointingly, Will Smith is letting her.Will Smith Tries To Use Humour to Deflect, But His Jokes Fall Short Against Stark RealityYesterday, Will Smith joined the conversation surrounding his tumultuous marriage, in a divisive way. In an Instagram captioned "OFFICIAL STATEMENT", Will Smith starts off the video alleging he is about to share his real opinion. before the video is edited to a series of birds-eye view, panned-out stills of the universe.The joke is obviously a light-hearted jab--and at this point in history, a totally welcome jab--at inflated celebrity egos and misguided sense of self-importance, and it almost works! If it wasn't more sad than it was self-aware. As Chris Rock aptly pointed out in his Netflix comedy special, Chris Rock: Selective Outrage, when it comes to Will Smith's and Jada Pinkett Smith's confusing marriage? “She hurt him way more than he hurt me.”Rock is, of course, referencing the painful (and viral) conversation that took place when Jada admitted to an affair with a family friend. She followed up this admission by asking how it made Will feel. Fans were not impressed with Will's "beta" behaviour and allowing his wife to disrespect him so casually and publicly.“Everybody in the world called him a b*tch. They called his wife a predator,” Rock said. “Everybody called him a b*tch and who’s he hit? Me! [Someone] he knows he can beat."- Chris Rock, on former friend Will Smith assaultingWhen Trying To Control The Narrative Gets Out Of Control@jadapinkettsmith/InstagramIf there's anything we can learn from Will and Jada Pinkett Smith's marriage is that trying to control the narrative may just make for a more confusing one.We don't need to have all the answers. But when we don't know what to do sometimes the best thing to do is nothing. Explosive actions and reactive behaviour doesn't just harm ourselves, but it can harm others in our life too.Will and Jada Pinkett Smith share adult children Jaden Smith, 25, and Willow Smith, 22 (Will has a son, Trey Smith, from a previous relationship). But Jada's need for the public to sign off on all her marital grievances may be causing her family more pain than she realizes. This certainly isn't the first time the family's private affairs were shared publicly. In fact, with her divulging podcast Red Table Talk, Jada has earned the reputation of oversharing her family's private life. Reports say their kids have had enough, "they wish some of their family's private matters remained private."When Unconditional Love Isn't EnoughFor Will Smith's part? It seems at least his love is unconditional. Smith made an emotional speech supporting his wife at a press event for her new memoir Worthy, describing their marriage as “a sloppy public experiment in unconditional love.”There is absolutely nothing wrong with making mistakes. In relationships that will last half a lifetime, we're bound to do it! However, if your goal is to heal, perhaps it is best to focus on that actual healing, instead of telling everyone how good you are at healing. There is a fine line between unconditional love and staying in a toxic relationship and continuing a cycle of abuse. Only Will and Jada can know for certain what is best for them. But until they get to their final destination, maybe it's a good idea to keep the journey to themselves.

Jada Pinkett Smith Shares Why She and Will Smith Don’t Celebrate Their Wedding Anniversary Anymore
Marriage

Jada Pinkett Smith Shares Why She and Will Smith Don’t Celebrate Their Wedding Anniversary Anymore

Jada Pinkett Smith and Will Smith got married on New Years Eve (many years ago!) and one would think that would be an amazing night to celebrate their anniversary each year – but it turns out they actually don’t!On a recent episode of Red Table Talk, Jada PinkettSmith addressed the topic of wedding anniversaries and she shared why her andWill no longer celebrate theirs. It comes down to the fact that it IS on NewYears Eve, and they have different ideas of how they like to spend the start ofa new year."Usually, Will on New Year’s likes to be in an adventure in the world somewhere. There’s no telling where he’s gonna be. I don’t wanna be out in the world. He now has the freedom [to] go and have an awesome adventure of some kind."RELATED: Why Will and Jada Will Never Divorce - and What Their Commitment Can Teach UsHowever, Jada prefers to stay in on NYE, and relax. "It's more a life partnership, so it's not steeped in that day. We don’t really celebrate that day anymore in that sense, because the context of our union is totally different."Will and Jada are one of our favorite couples because they are so comfortable in their lives together they are also able to nurture their lives as individuals. It's so powerful a statement and it's something inspirational we can all learn from!RELATED READING:3 Life-Changing Books That Inspired Will Smith to SucceedWill Smith Reveals the "Most Poisonous" Aspect of Marriage

Jada Pinkett Smith Explains Why She and Will Prefer the Term 'Life Partners' to 'Being Married'
Love Stories

Jada Pinkett Smith Explains Why She and Will Prefer the Term 'Life Partners' to 'Being Married'

This past July, Will Smith surprised the world on TIDAL's Rap Radar podcast when he announced that he and wife Jada Pinkett Smith prefer to refer to themselves as "life partners" instead of "being married.""I needed a different form to dissolve all the expectations that I had of a marriage," Jada, 47, tells PEOPLE in this week’s issue. "I needed to do that to see Will outside of husband and see him as a human being."It's no secret that Jada and Will take a different approach to marriage. The parents of three celebrated 20 years of marriage last December and continue to surprise us with their fresh perspective on what love can look like.RELATED: Will Smith’s Sweet Message for Jada Pinkett Smith Offers Key Lesson in Making a Relationship Last"We have all these expectations," she says. "’Oh, this is what a husband is. This is what a wife is.’ I started dissolving all the ideas and expectations and labels."Will, 50, will be the next guest on Jada's Facebook Watch show when it returns next Monday, a teaser from the upcoming episode reveals how real he gets when discuss their unique relationship."Will comes on the show for two episodes, and we talk about redefining our relationship, going from calling ourselves married to becoming life partners," she tells PEOPLE. "I felt like there was a way to speak about that that was open and transparent. But there are still aspects that are private!"RELATED: 5 Little Ways to Express Gratitude in a Long-Term RelationshipRed Table Talk comes back to Facebook on October 22. You can bet we'll be tuning in to hear more about what Will and Jada have to say about their inspiring dynamic as a couple.

Will Smith's Sweet Message for Jada Pinkett Smith Offers Key Lesson in Making a Relationship Last
Marriage

Will Smith's Sweet Message for Jada Pinkett Smith Offers Key Lesson in Making a Relationship Last

We’ve been in love with Will and Jada since they fell in love in front of our eyes on Fresh Prince Of Bel-Air decades ago. Despite being married since 1997, they've remained one of the sweetest and most in-love power couples on our radar.Case in point: Will’s latest Instagram post, a shoutout to Jada. The picture shows a selfie of the two of them with the caption "I just realized...This year we've been together more than HALF OUR LIVES!”Will and Jada just celebrated their 20th wedding anniversary this past December, which of course they also noted on Instagram. In it, Will shared some inspiring lessons he's learned throughout the years.Love is like gardening... I have learned to focus on helping you to blossom into what you want to be (into what you were born to be)... Rather than demanding that you become what my fragile ego needs you to be.– Will Smith“20 Years Ago today we held hands and walked naively down that aisle. Here’s what I’ve learned since,” the message reads, which goes on: “Love is Like Gardening… I have learned to focus on HELPING you to BLOSSOM into what YOU want to be (into what you were born to be)… Rather than Demanding that you become what my Fragile Ego needs you to be. I’ve learned to take pleasure in Nourishing YOUR dreams… Rather than wrestling with you to Fulfill my Selfish Needs & Satiate My Insecurities. I have learned that: Love is Listening. Love is Giving. Love is Freedom. Happy Anniversary, My Queen! I am forever Devoted to Nurturing your Deepest Truth.”Not everyone is as good with words or as public with their feelings as this couple, but it's an important message for us all. Never take each other for granted, and never stop letting the person you are with know how much you love and appreciate and value them. </div>

Why Will and Jada Will Never Divorce - And What Their Commitment Can Teach Us
Marriage

Why Will and Jada Will Never Divorce - And What Their Commitment Can Teach Us

Will Smith and Jada Pinkett Smith first met on the set of Will’s evergreen TV show The Fresh Prince of Bel-Air, when Jada auditioned for the role of his girlfriend.She was deemed too short for the part and lost out to Nia Long. But meeting Will was the beginning of something that goes beyond love – something up in the realm of soulmates.Why Jada and the Fresh Prince are a true power coupleJada and Will met in 1994 and became close friends, but attraction brought them together in 1995. Now married for more than 20 years, the couple can look back on two decades filled with love, mutual support, laughs and a beautiful family. However, their relationship started when Will was still married to his first wife Sheree Zampino, something Jada has admitted to deeply regretting.Although Smith and Zampino were separated, they were not legally divorced and there were heated moments, something Jada and Zampino discussed at length during the first episode of Jada’s Red Table Talk FB Watch show.“Because I did not understand marriage, I did not understand divorce, I probably should have fell back,” Jada told Zampino. But in time the two women worked out their differences, especially while navigating co-parenting Will and Zampino’s child Trey Smith.Speaking to Access Hollywood about having Will’s ex-wife on her show, Jada emphasized how much she learned from Zampino and how much the two of them have grown together in their effort to put Trey first.“She was my entry point to motherhood. I was co-mothering with her,” Jada opened up, adding “At that particular time, before [having a blended family] was popular, before it was even an idea, we were trying to create something that we had never experienced.Trey then became a big brother to Jaden Smith in 1998 and to Willow in 2000. And the family stuck together through thick and thin – after all, Will and Jada are one of those Hollywood couples that are seasonally in the tabloids with various so-called insiders reporting on their imminent divorce.

Jada Pinkett Smith Talks Addiction and Substance Abuse, Inspires Us with Fearless Approach to Tackling Hard Topics
Self-Development

Jada Pinkett Smith Talks Addiction and Substance Abuse, Inspires Us with Fearless Approach to Tackling Hard Topics

Trigger warning: this article discusses substance abuse, alcoholism and addiction Jada Pinkett Smith might be a multi-millionaire actress with her own successful talk show, but life started out roughly for her. In what was one the most honest episodes of her Red Table Talk FB Watch show, Jada spoke frankly about her own experiences with addiction, joined by family and friends -- and their personal demons. And while each of the guests walked their own path towards a healthy life, they all spoke of the importance of emotional health and the support of family and friends, reminding us to always check in with our loved ones and tell them they matter to us. It takes a lot of courage to share your truth, especially when it involves the darkest parts of your life. -- Jada Pinkett Smith The addict stereotype and the epidemic of prescription painkillers For Jada's family friend and RnB singer August Alsina, addiction was present since childhood. Both his father and stepfather were addicted to crack cocaine and his father lost his battle years ago. While the singer was aware of the destructive power of addiction, watching his father pawn off family assets and go through withdrawal over and over again, when it came to himself, he failed to recognize the signs. After an alcohol- and exhaustion-fueled accident left him in a coma for three days – even flatlining twice – August was prescribed painkillers. Because it’s coming from a doctor, you feel like, what am I doing wrong? -- August Alsina “I had endless supply of Percocet. I was raining Percocet,” August said, still struggling to believe the ease with which the narcotic was legally made available to him. But he was a functional addict, contradicting the drug addict’s stereotype, making it easy to deny the problem. His dysfunctional emotional health combined with being surrounded by people who abused drugs to an even higher extent made ignorance even easier. But one day Jada called him, crying because of his self-destructive behavior and asking him to get help. And everything changed. He detoxed at home, with loved ones like Jada checking in every day, supporting him towards sobriety. If someone loves you so much that it hurts them, then why can’t you love yourself enough to see that you’re hurting yourself? -- August Alsina Peer pressure and the lack of self-confidence “My entry into drugs was just trying to be part of the crowd, Jada’s mother Adrienne Banfield-Norris said, voice quivering with emotion. For Adrienne, it started with cigarettes at age 15 in an effort to deal with self-image and self-confidence issues. Then alcohol entered the picture, followed by marijuana, leading to a more than 20-year-long cocaine addiction. Loosing friends, family, relationships and with her employment being threatened, Adrienne knew she had to change something, but couldn’t do it for herself – she didn’t love herself enough. At that time, I didn’t think I was anything without a man, I had to put it on somebody else. -- Adrienne Banfield-Norris The reappearance of a former flame pushed her on the path of sobriety, though she still struggles that she did it “for a man.” Adrienne finally found strength in self-love and her faith in God. 27 years later, she is still sober, doesn’t worry about relapsing and does her best to support others on their journey. There was a power. God was looking out for us. I just had to let go and surrender, so I could receive what he was giving. -- Adrienne Banfield-Norris Escapism and drugs as emotional crutches For Ashley Marie Smith, Will Smith’s youngest sister, marijuana became a 24-hour habit. As a far lighter drug than opioids or alcohol, it was easy to deny she had an issue. But a two-week plan to stay sober brought a brutal awakening: she was in fact addicted, abusing it to deal with emotional pain. For Ashely Marie, it took a lot emotional work to kick the habit, because in the end weed wasn’t the problem. The issue lied within her and her refusal to deal with deep emotional pain, like the loss of her parents. It’s not what you’re doing, but how you’re with it. How you’re doing it. It’s the behavior that’s attached to it. -- Jada Pinkett Smith Loosing her father to drug overdose and watching her mom struggle for decades with drug abuse, put Jada into a prime spot for addiction. “My addictions jump around… I’m a binger,” Jada admitted. At one point in her life she “thought everything could be fixed by sex,” using it to numb her emotional struggles and run away from everyday life. Then it was alcohol, followed by fitness – a whole rollercoaster of self-destructive addictive behavior jeopardizing her health. In the end, it was all about achieving emotional health and inner peace and a constant vigilance over impulse control. I had my own addictions that I had to get over, and it just made me realize that really great people just get caught up. -- Jada Pinkett Smith Watch the full episode here: </p>

Jada Pinkett Smith Has Heartfelt Talk with Her Children, Blows Us Away with Her Parenting Approach
Parenting

Jada Pinkett Smith Has Heartfelt Talk with Her Children, Blows Us Away with Her Parenting Approach

In the Red Table Talk Facebook Watch show, Jada Pinkett Smith and her children Jaden and Willow, along with her mother Adrienne Banfield-Norris, share their extremely personal experiences and thoughts on big issues.Pinkett recently spoke about believing in her kids, knowing they will make the best decisions, and raising them to be independent.Jada Pinkett Smith's inspiring parenting approachThis particular episode discusses the ups and downs of parenting, and the difference between how Jada was raised by her own mom, and how Jada and Will raise their own kids. For example, Jada’s mother Adrienne points out that Jada’s kids have had “too much say in their own lives.”When Jada was growing up and asked why she was told to do something, her mom would say “because I said so!” but Jada’s parenting style is all about allowing her kids to make their own decisions.“I don’t want to make decisions for you,” Jada says. “I want to prepare you to have power over your own life.” Adrienne agrees that she had a sense of “ownership” over Jada that Jada does not have over her own kids.How it impacted Jaden and WillowWillow agrees that too much coddling can harm a child’s ability to live on their own and make their own decisions. Jada has less access to some areas her kids’ lives, and this helps them to know how to live their lives as their own.“The sooner I let him go, the faster he was going to come back.” Jada says of Jaden, and allowing him his independence to make his own decisions and live his life on his own.It was that independence to make their own decisions that gave the Smith children the confidence to lead their life on their own at early ages.“What motivates you and what you think is important is completely different than what was in my engine,” Jada says to her kids, explaining why this freedom was important, because they are their own people with their own needs, and she needed to let them discover what those needs are on their own.Looking for a fun resource for you and your children? Check out our article on the wisdom of Winnie the Pooh.

Willow Smith Bravely Reveals Self-Harm Struggles to Her Mom and Grandma, Powerful Conversation Ensues
Mental Health

Willow Smith Bravely Reveals Self-Harm Struggles to Her Mom and Grandma, Powerful Conversation Ensues

Trigger warning: This article contains topics of self-harm and depression. Music star Willow Smith may have taken the internet and entertainment world by storm with her 2010 Whip My Hair hit at only nine years old, but the success cost her dearly.Her mental health declined severely, and the period following her retreat from the spotlight took her into a very dark place, to the point where she start harming herself.In a powerful demonstration of vulnerability, Willow revealed the heartbreaking secret to the world and mom Jada Pinkett Smith for the first time ever on Red Table Talk, the Facebook Watch exclusive show hosted by Jada, her mother Adrienne and Willow.The show, which discusses universally relatable topics from an intergenerational perspective, approached the topic of loss in the episode. After Jada opened up about how much Tupac’s death still affects her to this day, she asked Willow what her biggest loss so far in life has been.“I honestly feel like I lost my sanity at one point,” Willow said, explaining how she questioned her own identity, perspectives and outlook in life after deciding to pull back from the music world. “I was just plunged into this black hole and I was like cutting myself, and doing crazy things” Willow bravely opened up, to a shocked Jada and Adrienne.Nobody knew the extent of her pain.“What? Really? When were you cutting yourself? I didn’t see that part,” said a visibly tearful Jada. Shocked that she didn’t know, she questioned her daughter to find out whether anyone else in the family was aware. No one knew, as Willow hid it well, telling only one friend about it up until now.“Totally lost my sanity for a moment there,” she said. “I never talk about it, because it was such a short, weird point in my life, but you have… you have to pull yourself out of it.”Willow went on to talk about how a lot of teenage girls struggle with depression and self-harm, and that her struggle was by far not an isolated case. She does not believe this is a new affliction, just that there is more openness and awareness nowadays about the issue. Watch the brave discussion it its entirety below:Editor’s Note: Struggling and feeling hopeless? You are not alone. Please call the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 1-800-273-TALK (8255).

Jada Pinkett Smith: Your Happiness Comes First
Goalcast Originals

Jada Pinkett Smith: Your Happiness Comes First

Jada Pinkett Smith - Make the Best of It Jada Pinkett Smith talks about the importance of being happy, because it's only when you take care of yourself that you have the capacity to take care of others. Transcript: "You're a bad mother. You're a bad mother if you do anything that makes you happy. You better be at home and at every single moment don't you take your eyes off that kid, those children of yours, and that's the messaging. That is the messaging and that messaging will drive somebody crazy. You have a right to be happy. "Your happiness is what fuels you from the inside. You. I've given all this up for you and you've got to make this right by me and you're supposed to make me happy because we've lost our way on how to make ourselves happy. You have to take care of yourself in order to have the alignment and the power to take care of others at the capacity that we do because when you stop taking care of yourself, you get out of balance and you really forget how to take care of others. "You know that's why it's very difficult to look at something and go that's right, that's wrong, because you don't know. You don't know where your gifts lie. You don't know where your treasures are. You just go with the flow and make the best of it."

Will Smith and Jada Pinkett Smith - Find That Drive
Self-Development

Will Smith and Jada Pinkett Smith - Find That Drive

Will and Jada Smith's inspirational interview with Oprah where they explain why they don't tell their kids what they should do and how instead they are motivating them to find their own inner drive. Transcript: - [Voiceover] Yeah. - Right, so, you lose all 'Cause I said so, you know, that's what it is. When you're in that survival generation, you tend to lose-- - Yeah, which is how I was raised. - Right, we all were. - We all were raised that way, and you tend to lose the humanity and the purpose of why you're working so hard in the first place. - That's right, and why you actually have children. - Right, absolutely. - Not just to make them do what you want them to do. - [Will] Absolutely. So, you know, it's like with Trey and his football, and Willow is singing, and Jaden acting, I just want them to live in service to greatness. I want them to live and to create in a way that when people see it, people are inspired, and people become better just by having contact with the things-- - With their excellence. - [Will] With their excellence. - But they have to be able to define that for themselves. And that's the thing. We can't define that-- - [Will] Therein lies the rub. - That's right. Because we might have a vision for what we see. But at the end of the day, Jaden has to have his own vision, Willow has to have her own vision, and so does Trey. And so we are there to help inspire and facilitate their vision. Because in order to reach the type of excellence in which Will is talking about, you have to reach inside yourself to find that drive. Nobody can put that drive in you. So you have to inspire the individual to find and focus on the goal that they want for themselves.