Woman Thanks Ex-Boyfriend's Kid For Making Her Feel Loved
Jen and her brother, Todd, were just 10 and 12 years old when their father began dating Shirley Norton. It was 1986. Their love affair was short-lived, lasting only a year.
And while it may have been brief, it left an impact that stayed with Shirley until she died.
Eighteen years later, Jen received a phone call out of the blue. It was from a bank manager, informing her that Shirley had bequeathed $50,000 each to her and her brother. But in addition to the inheritance, Shirley also left behind a note.
A Random Phone Call
@intoxicatedinsights69 Absolutely gut wrenching story! Step parents truly are angels on earth. Thank you guys for all that you do. Thank you to the endlessly fascinating Jen, for sharing this story with us. Full episode is out. Link in bio
Jen recently shared her story on her podcast, Intoxicated Insights. She also posted a clip of the episode on TikTok where it has gone viral, garnering more than 2 million views, 237,000 likes, and nearly 5,000 comments.
"I get a random phone call, this is like 2004, I have two small children," she explained to her co-host Sage.
"I get this random call from this woman from Utah who's a bank manager telling me that one of my dad's ex-girlfriends has passed away and left me and my brother $50,000 each."
Jen via TikTok
Initially, she thought she was being punked. It took the bank manager more than half an hour to finally convince Jen to provide her address.
She explained to Sage that the woman the bank manager called her about was "legit" one of her father's ex-girlfriends and they had only dated for one year before he broke up with her. But throughout that year, Shirley took care of Jen, buying her clothes, decorating her room, and being "absolutely sweet" to her.
Jen remembers the day Shirley left. She begged Shirley to take her with her.
"I might have seen her like maybe one or two more times but my dad got a new girlfriend and that was that."
Until 18 years later...
When Jen received the mail from the bank manager she discovered that in addition to the cash, Shirley had also left behind a two-page letter.
Jen has held onto that letter for 20 years.
The Letter From Her Father's Ex-Girlfriend
Jen's father's ex-girlfriend bequeathed $50,000 each to her and her brother. But in addition to the inheritance, she also left behind a note.
Youtube/intoxicatedinsights
Holding back tears, Jen read Shirley's letter aloud:
"Dear Todd and Jenny, I bet you both are asking yourself, who is she?" the letter began.
"I met you and your father in 1986 when you were about 10 and 12 years old. You each made a remarkable impact on me. You were both great kids. You were friendly and made me feel welcome in your lives."
To further jog the siblings' memories, Shirley wrote that at the time Jen wanted to be an actress and own a pink Ferrari. She talked about going to SeaWorld and spending Thanksgiving at Lake Tahoe. She reminisced about Knotts Berry Farm and eating dinner together on the Queen Mary.
"Todd, when we went to Circus Circus, you won a little stuffed lion for me," she added. "I still have it."
And when Jenny went to camp? She made Shirley a wall hanging out of a pie plate. "I still have it too," Shirley wrote.
"I never had any children of my own," she added. "But for that one year you made me feel like I was part of your family."
Cue the tears.
Shirley also shared in the letter that she'd had a kidney transplant in 1992. "This gift of life gave me many extra years so I could enjoy this amazing world."
She ended the letter, writing: "I had a good life. I would like to make your life a little easier and more secure. I pray you both have wonderful lives. P.S. Jenny, please don't buy a pink Ferrari," she joked before adding, "But if you really want one, buy it."
"We don't always know the impact we make on someone's life"
@intoxicatedinsights69 Replying to @AileneTH jen says thank you!
The money came at a time when Jen needed it most. In a follow-up TikTok she explains her son had just been diagnosed with autism.
"At the time my youngest son had just got diagnosed with autism and so the money was great because I paid for a lot of therapies for him."
She also shared that the family moved "and it did make my life a lot better." (Although she never did get that pink Ferrari).
But it's the letter that is truly priceless.
"The letter was the best. I've held onto it for all these years. I read it, it's sad, and it always touches my heart."
Jen via TikTok
It's also touched the hearts of more than 2 million TikTok viewers.
"Perfect example that we don’t always know the impact we make on someone’s life. She never forgot you," one commenter wrote.
"Omg I’m sobbing 😭.. that was so so sweet," wrote another. "All the memories she still had of the kids ❤️❤️"
A third said, "As an adult child of divorce who’s Dad had many girlfriends that I loved but never got to say goodbye to, this helped to heal me. Maybe they loved me as much as I loved them."
Sometimes people aren't meant to stay in our lives. They are there for a short time and then they're gone. But just because they are no longer with us, it doesn't mean they are forgotten.
Shirley never forgot the time she spent with Jenny and Todd, even two decades later. Her generous bequest and heartfelt letter were a testament to the deep impact their brief connection had on her life.
It's also a sweet reminder that blood isn't what binds a family together. It's love, no matter how briefly we get to share it.
*Featured image contains photo by cottonbro studio
Why Racing to the Finish Line of Life Leads to Stress, Anxiety, and Unhappiness
Imagine you’re traveling down a long, empty road.
This road is filled with landmarks, beautiful scenery, and interesting stops. However, along the way, you never allow yourself to stop. Not even once. As you pass by one beautiful scene after another, racing quickly without a moment of rest, you’re constantly saying to yourself, “Keep going, you can’t afford to stop”, “You don’t deserve to stop”, and, “All I need to do is get to the end and everything will be great.”
This way of thinking is, unfortunately, critically flawed. Since we were little we’ve been taught that we need to work hard towards a goal. And that’s perfectly fine. But more specifically, we were taught that we need to give everything of ourselves now to become successful and happy later -- with success usually encompassing some combination of money and material possessions.
The thing is, this goal eventually grows into a sort of fantastical idea within our mind, becoming more myth than reality. We imagine a sort of “pot of gold” at the end of a rainbow, with the rainbow being the long-term work done towards achieving success, while the pot of gold is the monetary and material rewards we receive. But this myth isn’t just dangerous – it’s deadly.
Why Racing to the Finish Line of Life Leads to Stress, Anxiety, and Unhappiness
The reality is, this idea of a perfect everlasting happiness, of this perfect ending where we ride off into the sunset, is a myth.
And this is okay because it turns out this wasn’t how to realize happiness in the first place. Happiness is available to us in each moment if we know how to look for it, which is a far better deal. The problem is we live out our life thinking that if we just get to that magical pot of gold everything will be perfect for the rest of our life. This is the sign of a critical and very harmful misconception.
And it leads to a lot of damage. By pushing yourself with little rest and relaxation for years our body and mind develop serious problems, most notably stress and anxiety, which then ends up affecting our physical health in myriad ways, potentially leading to burnout and even serious illness.
So in the end, we race through the journey of life, missing all of the incredible moments of happiness along the way just because we think we’ll find this ultimate form of happiness at the end of the road. We miss out on the true happiness available to us in each moment all the while building up stress, anxiety, and potentially even serious health issues that threaten to shorten our precious life.
But if happiness and fulfillment are available to us in each moment, it means that at any point in our life we can learn to stop and tap into this amazing gift. And by changing our approach, we can continue to work towards meaningful goals while enjoying our life now and finding fulfillment in the work we do each day. To accomplish that, I’ve developed a simple exercise based on a combination of basic NLP (neuro-linguistic programming) and mindfulness meditation that can be practiced at any time of day and in any situation.
Exercise: Breaking the pattern
It’s important to note that at the heart of the race to this mythical accomplishment is a habitual behavior: when we wake up, consider a break, get off of work (scratch that – when we’re supposed to get off work), and while doing anything else, tell ourselves that we can’t (or don’t deserve to) stop, that we have a long way to go, and that we need to keep racing to achieve this mythical accomplishment.
And because this is based primarily on a habitual behavior, in order to stop it we need to develop a way to interrupt and change the behavior. Habitual behaviors are patterns, and if you stop or break the pattern enough times you begin to break (or alter) the habit. By interrupting ourselves in the midst of the process we can gain clarity, but more importantly, we can start to change the behavior by adopting a new habitual process (or altering the existing one to make it healthier).
Exactly how do you do that? Generally, by doing something completely different from the behavioral pattern you’ve adopted, to “shock” yourself out of the pattern and become present so you can act more consciously, more intentionally. In this case, by doing the exact opposite of racing and rushing around: stopping.
Use these simple instructions to start breaking the habit of racing and begin adopting a healthier pattern of behavior in your daily life:
By using this simple exercise, you can begin to break this harmful pattern and replace it with a healthier and more mindful behavior. By doing so, you’ll learn to appreciate your life now – from moments with your family, simple silence, and even the little moments of beauty that once went undetected – and better manage the stress and anxiety that inevitably arises from a busy life. The more you do it the more you’ll notice yourself able and willing to stop and rest too.
The finish line of life is a harmful myth that leads us to live out our entire life without ever truly living. With this exercise, you can begin to break the habitual patterns connected with it and truly live a happier and more fulfilled life.