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Jennifer Lopezs Relationship with Violet Affleck Is a Lesson In Parenting  And Its Beautiful

Jennifer Lopezs Relationship with Violet Affleck Is a Lesson In Parenting And Its Beautiful

The transition is a process that needs to be handled with so much care," Jennifer Lopez says of what it takes to create a blended family.

How did you celebrate this July 4th? If you're an A-list celeb then you were rubbing shoulders with the likes of Jennifer Lopez, Ben Affleck and Ben's daughter, Violet, at the official Hampton White Party.

J.Lo has been a stepmother to Affleck's three children (Violet Anne, 17, Seraphina Rose, 13, and Samuel, 10), from his marriage with Jennifer Garner, for the last two years. But there looks to be an extra-special bond between the eldest Affleck child and Jenny from the Block. And there doesn't seem to be a wicked step-mother in anywhere in the mix.

Jennifer Lopez Has Blended Families Before

Jennifer Lopez with first husband Marc Anthony and daughter Emme.

Lopez has had numerous high-profile relationships (and breakups) and they’ve all had one thing in common: The singer’s kids are always her top priority. Lopez welcomed twins Emme and Max with then-husband Marc Anthony in February 2008 and while they eventually separated in 2011, they’ve stayed close for their children. 

In 2017, Lopez told Live with Kellythat they’ll always be “great friends” because it’s best for the family. “We share something very special in the kids and we know that,” she explained. “We’re there for them, and that’s the main thing.” What’s more, “I’m always gonna be there for him, he’s always gonna be there for me.”

When Lopez eventually found love again with Alex Rodriguez, her kids, as well as his two daughters, Natasha and Ella, were again a priority, “I was so loving to his kids and he was so loving and accepting of mine, and they embraced each other right away.” 

Sharing what it takes to make a blended family work, Roriguez noted it’s all about perspective. "We positioned what could be perceived as a negative into a positive, by saying to the girls, look, now you don't have one house, you have two houses. You don't have two parents, you have four parents. Lucky you, the more the merrier." 

In the end, Jennifer Lopez and A-Rod split in April 2021 and Lopez went on to rekindle her romance with her now-husband, Ben Affleck. Yet again, her twins, as well as Affleck’s three kids with ex-wife Jennifer Garner — Seraphina, Violet, and Samuel — were top of mind.

Violet Affleck’s Relationship with Jennifer Lopez

Jennifer Lopez with Violet Affleck and Ben Affleck.
Pierre Suu/Getty Images

When Jennifer Lopez and Ben Affleck began dating for a second time in mid-2021, they were spotted making real strides to bring their two families together. That August, for example, they enjoyed a number of fun family outings in Hollywood, including attending “Hamilton” and a magic show in one weekend.  

A source told E! at the time that "Jennifer has made a big effort to get to know Ben's kids and welcome them into her home and her life.” The insider added that “letting the kids have fun and bond” was incredibly important to both of them. 

Not that it was easy. As Lopez told Vogue in 2022, “The transition is a process that needs to be handled with so much care” because they have so many feelings; they’re teens.”

And now that she’s married to Affleck, she really wants to be a source of strength for his and Jennifer Garner’s kids. “What I hope to cultivate with our family is that his kids have a new ally in me and my kids have a new ally in him, someone who really loves and cares about them but can have a different perspective and help me see things that I can’t see with my kids because I’m so emotionally tied up.”

Does Violet Affleck Like Jennifer Lopez?

Jennifer Lopez, Ben Affleck, and Violet Affleck dressed in white for 4th of July party.

It seems to be working. Affleck and Garner’s eldest daughter, Violet Affleck, in particular appears to have developed a special bond with her stepmom. In July 2022, for example, they were spotted sharing a huge hug in Paris during the Afflecks’ family honeymoon, which was a genuinely heartwarming moment.

Jump to August and Violet and Lopez were spotted shopping in New York City, then in September, they were captured having lunch and enjoying a day out in Beverly Hills. The “On The Floor” singer even let the 16-year-old drive!

Just this past 4th of July the seventeen-year-old was invited, alongside Lopez, to attend Michael Rubin's celeb mega party. The two can be seen hugging and mugging for the cameras.

Why Wasn’t Violet Affleck at Dad Ben’s Wedding to J.Lo? 

Jennifer Lopez and Ben Affleck surprised fans when they tied the knot in a shotgun Las Vegas wedding that took place at A Little White Wedding Chapel in July 2022. Lopez broke the news in her OnTheJLo newsletter, sharing that their kids were with them for the shock ceremony, but according to Page Six, only Emme and Seraphina attended. 

Given Lopez’s obvious connection with Affleck’s daughter Violet, some folks wondered why she missed the nuptials. One insider said it was partly because the whole thing was organized at the last second, but there was reportedly a deeper reason too. “Violet stayed home because she’s extremely loyal to her mom,” the source claimed. 

Whether that's true or not, Jennifer Garner took it all in stride. She’s said to have sent the couple flowers to congratulate them on their big day and, according to one insider, “Jen welcomed J.Lo into their family, officially, after they got married.”

As the source explained, Garner is happy for her ex because “[Lopez] is such a great influence on Ben and all that Jen has ever wanted was for him to be healthy, happy, and sober, so that he can be there for his children.”

Jennifer Garner and Jennifer Lopez Seem to Also Get Along

Jennifer Garner with daughter Violet Affleck at the White House.
Nathan Howard / Getty Images

Given Jennifer Lopez and Jennifer Garner’s history relating to Ben Affleck, it’s easy to assume that the two women don’t have a great relationship. However, that’s absolutely not the case. 

For one, they’re handling the situation like adults – without any jealousy and with the understanding that relationships ebb and flow and don’t always work out.

Case in point: Jennifer Garner’s reaction to Affleck and Lopez’s marriage was not what many expected. Rather than giving the media a public statement, Garner kept mum and, instead chose to focus on her family’s happiness. As always, her focus is solely on her kids' happiness.

Jennifer Lopez and Jennifer Garner Always Put Violet and Other Kids First

Indeed, that’s something both Jennifers have in common. Their kids come first.

Two moms can be better than one and their kids all agree. What’s more, they apparently share “a unique bond” and J.Lo truly appreciates the fact that Jennifer opened herself and her home to J.Lo and her children. Indeed, Lopez herself told Vogue that Garner is “an amazing co-parent.”

Just like Lopez is trying her best to be there for Affleck and Garner’s kids, Garner is putting in the effort to get to know Lopez’s twins. She appears to be especially close with Emme who reportedly “really likes” her new stepmom thanks to a shared hobby. An insider told HollywoodLife that Garner “is very hands-on and loves to plant plants and garden, which are things that Emme enjoys too.”

Every family is unique and, as with all relationships, its dynamics are likely to change over time. The same way that we as individuals grow and evolve, so do families. The key, as Jennifer Lopez and Jennifer Garner show us, is being open to change while also being cognisant that it may be harder for some, especially kids. But it looks like Lopez and Violet have nothing to worry about.

A blended family can only succeed if the effort is made by everyone to communicate and get to know one another while accepting that some unions simply aren’t forever. 

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